Instead, they spent their wedding night with the mother of the bride helping her out of her wedding dress after Mr. Sethi fell sound asleep. The couple, who are 30 years old and live in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, were consummated the next day. “We’re more of a morning sex person anyway,” Lewis said.
Planning can work even for couples who were already sexually active. “We were very strategic in how we wanted the night to go so we could have sex,” Ofelia Saba Ramírez said of her wedding to Jessica Saba Ramírez, both graduate students, on March 25, 2022. They limited their alcohol intake and stayed hydrated. . on their wedding day, also consuming energy drinks to stay awake.
In the end, the couple, who are 41 years old and live in Los Angeles, had sex “not very energetic, but incredibly memorable,” according to Ofelia Saba Ramírez. They felt like they were continuing the sexual connection that they said was an important part of their relationship, and despite being exhausted, they felt proud of themselves for making it a priority.
“The mainstream of pop culture has infiltrated our minds and led us to believe that wedding night sex is supposed to be a magical night of transcendental pleasure,” said Shavon Gaddy-Dalrymple, a psychotherapist in the city of New York that specializes in couples. “Couples tend not to plan for their wedding night sex,” he added, “but have the highest expectation around its success.”
Ms Gaddy-Darlrymple recommended appointing a friend to be the wedding night planner, someone who can set up the room the couple will retire to after the wedding and help ensure the couple leaves the reception of the wedding early enough (and sober) so that they are not completely exhausted.
However, regardless of the number of opportunities a couple has, they still may not be able to have sex on their wedding night.